Yesterday I went for a much needed haircut. Thank you Bernadette! That was one of the longest times I had gone without getting a haircut or color in I don’t know how long. With being a hairdresser for 20 years I have had my fair share of styles. I was so bad about changing my hair that the clients would come in just to see what I had done to my hair that week. I think I have been every color of the rainbow, including blue, green and pink. I have found that no matter how far I am in the dumps if I do something with my hair I feel better. Now that I am no longer a hairdresser I can no longer do the crazy hair colors or have the opportunity to cut it as often as I once did. I am trying to make sure that I don’t lose myself in the grief and not do the things that once made me happy and doing my hair made me happy.
Super Bowl is coming up and I do not want to be anywhere near a television when that happens. Drew loved football and he savored his Super Bowl parties. It was the only time of the year I would buy that cheese in can. I have no idea what he saw in that stuff, it was horrible. He would start weeks before telling me what he wanted me to cook for his party. It was almost always the same things, wings, nachos, and lots of junk he wasn’t allowed to have normally. He would invite friends and it was always entertaining. Especially for me. I loved those parties, I loved seeing him so into something. Needless to say I have no desire to watch anything to do with football this year.
I have been fortunate to make some great connections and friendships from a baby group on Facebook. We all were pregnant and had our babies close to the same time. We have been “friends” since we were pregnant with our 3 year old. As a group we have been through a lot. The great thing is we are all truly friends, even if we have not met each other in person. Hopefully it won’t be long and we can plan a meet up. This group of women flooded my mail with congratulations when I graduated from college in May and they flooded me with condolences when Drew passed away. I am truly blessed to be apart of this wonderful group of women. For Christmas they got together and sent me a gift card for a spa day at one of our local spas. I decided that Super Bowl would be the perfect opportunity to use it. My good friend Samantha and I are going to spend all day getting pampered and not having anything to do with football. Instead of wondering which down it is I will be receiving a massage and facial. I can’t wait. I need some pampering. I need to remember what it feels like to just think of me for a few hours. I think that gets lost when you are trying to be a mother, wife, and friend. I am lucky to have friends that know that I need to do this and have helped me make it possible. Sam knew this would be a hard time for me and helped make it happen also.
Drew and Madison were practically raised in a hair salon. They never batted an eye when we would do conditioning treatments or homemade facials.
Drew was always such a good sport about all the beauty days. The good thing of being raised that way he was, he was very observant when it came to girls new hair styles and makeup. He was usually the first person that would notice when I would do something to my hair. He would be right there to compliment me and tell me “You look beautiful Mama”. He would have made a great husband. I wish he had the opportunity to do that. Man, do I miss that. I miss him and just when I think I can handle this something smacks me in the face that reminds me of my loss.